Spoiler Alert – This post will talk about Wonder Woman 1984 and it will involve spoilers. If you haven’t yet watched this movie, please consider skipping this post.
The Dear Wonderful Hubby and I recently watched Wonder Woman 1984. We enjoyed it. It was light(er) and colorful and entertaining.
The script, however, did have major issues.
Some reading buddies have asked me in the past what I mean about a plot being ‘tight.’ That’s easiest illustrated by using a plot that ISN’T tight.
Wonder Woman 1984 is a great (or, rather, bad – grins) example of this.
At the beginning of the movie, for example, a jewelry store is being robbed. The thieves aren’t seeking to steal jewelry. They want the antiques being sold out of a back room.
That’s a very specific goal…especially for thieves who are portrayed as being inept and unsophisticated. They don’t seem to be the types to choose hard-to-resell antiquities over easy-to-fence diamonds and gold.
I assumed someone hired them. Yet they aren’t searching for a specific item when they rob the place and they clearly can’t take everything. Some of the items are too large to be easily or discreetly carried out of the store. They appeared to be stealing random sh*t.
If the thieves were hired by someone, we never find out who did that hiring. Or what that person was seeking to find.
We never see or hear about the thieves past that early scene. They are throwaway characters.
The two purposes of the scene seemed to be showcasing Wonder Woman’s powers and transferring the dream stone, via the FBI, to the Smithsonian where Wonder Woman works.
That’s a loosely written scene. It does the bare minimum, moves one plot point forward.
A tighter scene would have the thieves working for the villain or for an alternate villain. That they were chosen by the villain would relay things to us about this big baddie, about his connections, his personality, his goals.
We’d then see the thieves a few more times during the movie. The thieves might reveal or reflect more aspects of the villain.
Or maybe the thieves flip on the villain and align themselves with Wonder Woman. And then they reveal or reflects aspects of our heroine.
There are a gazillion other ways to make this scene do more. Maybe the happy little girl Wonder Woman saves appears in the world is going to Hell scene (instead of a random family). Or there is a running joke about shopping malls being dangerous.
That would tie this early scene to future scenes. It would mean more, would make the plot more cohesive, be ‘tighter’.
The movie would feel like one work of art instead of a series of random scenes.
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Under Strain
A damaged cyborg warrior is hunted by a peace-loving human female.
***
Strain is severely malfunctioning. The D Model cyborg was the sole survivor after a horrific decision was made by his cruel manufacturers. He hates all humans, and when he attacks one who is under his cyborg leader’s protection, he is reprimanded, stripped of his weapons, and told to watch and not actively participate in the next mission.
That mission takes place on a small remote planet. Its lush terrain should only be inhabited by the cyborgs they were sent to rescue, but Strain senses another presence on the surface. She is watching him, tracking him, hunting him.
A fully operational cyborg would end her lifespan.
Strain wants to claim her. Forever.
Kamyelle is the only one left of her kind. Warriors have killed the other nonviolent human inhabitants of her planet. She survived…barely…by hiding in the trees, observing her enemies, and covering herself with lifeform scan-concealing mud.
When a handsome, gray-skinned, brilliant-blue-eyed male arrives, surrounded by weapon-carrying warriors, she has to save him. Warriors harm and they kill. That is what they do.
She won’t allow them to hurt Strain.
***
Under Strain is a STANDALONE Cyborg SciFi Romance set in a dark, gritty, sometimes-violent universe.
It features a broken warrior, a human female who thinks he’s perfect, and velociraptor-like dinosaurs who view them both as light, tasty snacks.
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Smashwords:
